To Hug, or Not To Hug?

I’m addressing the subject of hugging, as is obvious by my title. Some of you may have noticed that I am somewhat uncomfortable when it comes to hugging. Sure, I’ll do it if someone else initiates it, but usually, I like the smile and wave approach. I’m not saying that hugging is bad at all. I just want to know when and which version applies to each situation.

Now, in my estimation, there are many types of hugs. There is the Mom’s Hug ‘You’re never leaving!’ full on, hard squeeze. Very similar is the Grandma Hug ‘Thanks for visiting’ which includes a big wet kiss to your eye. We have the ‘My hands are full, so I’ll just squeeze your shoulders and bump your hip.’ hug. The Bear Hug, both arms around the other person’s arms in a choking death grip. The One Arm Over, One Arm Limp hug. The Side Squeeze, slightly less awkward than the ‘my hands are full’. The Head Squeeze usually done by someone taller than you, and it feels like your eyes are going to pop out of your head!!!!! And my favorite is the classic Guy Hug, shake hands and chest bump with 3 taps to the back to signify ‘I’m not gay.’ I’m sure there are many varieties which I am forgetting at the moment, and I’m sure you’ll bring them to my memory.

Now, I’m always confused which hug to do in which situation. One of my cousins actually tried to shake my hand instead of a hug, so we ended up doing a weird version of the ‘Guy Hug’. On one side of my family everyone hugs, the other side all of the women hug, and the guys just shake hands. The women always do the slightly less emotional version of the Mom Hug. The men tend to do the Head Squeeze, to me at least. Oh, and if the hugger’s hands are empty but the huggee’s hands are full, do you do the Side Squeeze, the Bear Hug, or the My Hands Are Full????

Then you also encounter the awkward left or right situation. This can be incredibly embarrassing if you get stuck in the silly dance of left – right, until you end up bumping foreheads!!! Not that it’s ever happened to me! *coughs and clears throat*

I don’t think I really solved anything, in this commentary. But, it probably got you thinking about hugging. Kind of odd, I know. Now, To Hug or Not To Hug? It’s up to you!